Windows of Opportunity
by Soozung Sa

Grief, tragedy, crises, and trauma are never planned. These moments catch us off guard, surprise us, and leave us confused. As leaders who minister to the least, the last, and the lost — even with all our training, praying, and experience — sometimes we are also confused about how to minister to those who are hurting. Each situation is different. Each circumstance will be different from the next. Often these moments are windows of opportunity to bring people in and to show them the grace that Christ extends to us. These moments may be opportunities when we reintroduce or introduce for the first time the mystery of God, the healing power of God, or the simple presence of God. It is always unfortunate when we pacify a sensitive and difficult situation with poorly timed words or an offering of prayer, just as an easy way out of listening to someone's heart. It happens, and we are witnesses to these awkward moments. Perhaps we are even guilty of such platitudes ourselves.

As spiritual leaders who carefully and prayerfully discern the words needed to speak or the actions needed to take, you should consider the following resource to tuck away for future use: Mommy, Please Don't Cry by Linda Deymaz. There may be just the right situation or hurting individual who may find the book Mommy, Please Don't Cry helpful. Purchase a few and have them ready as the circumstances present themselves in your ministry.

I have found that one of the most difficult situations people face is losing a child. No matter what the age of the child at his or her death, there is always intense grief when a child's death precedes his or her parents' death. The grief is even more intense when a child dies at a very young age.

Mommy, Please Don't Cry by Linda Deymaz (Multnomah Publishers, Inc., 1996; ISBN 9781885305459) is a poignant book written from the perspective of a child who has made the journey to be with Jesus ahead of her parents. The illustrations are whimsical and peaceful. It is the type of book that will make you cry, giggle with contentment, and feel a glimmer of peace with life and death. Scriptural references are given about heaven, and there is space provided to journal thoughts. The wisdom of a child warms the heart and soul in this book. The author herself lost her little girl and ventured to write this book as a part of her healing process. Linda Deymaz does a wonderful job of illustrating the eternal life we have been promised.

Although this book will not work for all situations, it is one that you will want on your bookshelf so that when the right moment comes along and when the right window is open for you, you have an appropriate gift to offer to someone who is hurting.

Posted 7-15-02

Soozung Sa is a former staff member of the General Board of Discipleship.