Get Real With Youth
by Graham N. West, pastor, St. Paul's United Methodist Church, Stevens Point, WI

Once your child enters adolescence, secure her or him in a cardboard box with air holes and a food hatch. When she or he turns sixteen, close up the holes and hatch.

That was the advice once given to parents concerned about raising their teens.

Young people often get a bad rap. As soon as they grow up to look us in the eyes or point out the inconsistencies of our arguments, we fear them and pull away. Like us, youth are desperately trying to find themselves in a vastly and rapidly changing world where most don't know up from down.

United Methodist churches have not always been places where youth gravitate. Yes, they are with us through confirmation; but they then fade like Sunday's flowers. As young adults, they go off to college, where they spread their wings but rarely relate to the church. Although there are exceptions, we are not raising young people who seek out the church.

It seems to me that few preachers are so endowed with gifts that they alone can reach our young people. More is needed: some face-to-face engagement with youth that shows them that faith and life can be real.

Before young people are interested in what we believe, they may well want to know whether we believe in them, whether we accept and love them as Christ would do.

We can do some things to make our churches more hospitable to young people. We need at least to know them by the most important word in their vocabulary, their name. We must reach out to them, stop and talk with them, compliment them on their achievements, and show interest in their struggles and challenges. We must welcome them among us and not just send them to the youth room — where the couches are old throw-outs. Our welcome must include their culture, their music, and their presence. We must create space so they can be themselves, relate to one another, and learn in youth-friendly ways.

Our churches must also do more than the annual youth service. Young people have much to offer; for they, too, are gifted to serve Christ among us. So we must invite them into active ministry and allow them to come into their own among us.

But most important: Local church leaders must show by example a relationship with Jesus Christ that is real and personal. Young people want to know what it means to be Christ's followers. We must be resolved in our faith in Christ and alive in our discipleship. We must be engaged with our world in relevant and life-giving ways. We must live the Christian life with an infectious joy that youth admire.

Besides an explanation of the gospel, they need a demonstration of it. That's something we all can offer. When we get real with young people, perhaps then they will know not so much what we believe as the Christ in whom we trust.

Posted 4-5-04.